The Face on the Milk Carton (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I’ve been trying for a long time to figure out the best way to tell my milk-carton story. Here are the reasons I feel compelled to tell it:

1.  It’s an unbelievable tale. You’ll think I’m making it up. But I swear I’m not.

2.  I have finally begun to unpack all the sh*t that led to this “adventure,” and writing it out will be therapeutic…I hope…if not, I’ll just have my mail forwarded to the asylum.

3.  It’s the one time in my life that I had a true best friend that I hid nothing from…and I mean NOTHING. I shall protect the innocent and not write about her here (she accompanied me on this little escapade) unless she writes or calls and tells me it’s okay. (You know who you are. CallmeImissyou.)

4.  Craig is making me do it.

If you still think this is about an actual milk carton, sadly there’s nothing I can do for you except have you click here. And now I’ll be bracing myself if anyone needs me.